Best of the Week
Most Popular
1. Investing in a Bubble Mania Stock Market Trending Towards Financial Crisis 2.0 CRASH! - 9th Sep 21
2.Tech Stocks Bubble Valuations 2000 vs 2021 - 25th Sep 21
3.Stock Market FOMO Going into Crash Season - 8th Oct 21
4.Stock Market FOMO Hits September Brick Wall - Evergrande China's Lehman's Moment - 22nd Sep 21
5.Crypto Bubble BURSTS! BTC, ETH, XRP CRASH! NiceHash Seizes Funds on Account Halting ALL Withdrawals! - 19th May 21
6.How to Protect Your Self From a Stock Market CRASH / Bear Market? - 14th Oct 21
7.AI Stocks Portfolio Buying and Selling Levels Going Into Market Correction - 11th Oct 21
8.Why Silver Price Could Crash by 20%! - 5th Oct 21
9.Powell: Inflation Might Not Be Transitory, After All - 3rd Oct 21
10.Global Stock Markets Topped 60 Days Before the US Stocks Peaked - 23rd Sep 21
Last 7 days
Bitcoin Price TRIGGER for Accumulating Into Alt Coins for 2022 Price Explosion - Part 2 - 3rd Dec 21
Stock Market Major Turning Point Taking Place - 3rd Dec 21
The Masters of the Universe and Gold - 3rd Dec 21
This simple Stock Market mindset shift could help you make millions - 3rd Dec 21
Will the Glasgow Summit (COP26) Affect Energy Prices? - 3rd Dec 21
Peloton 35% CRASH a Lesson of What Happens When One Over Pays for a Loss Making Growth Stock - 1st Dec 21
Stock Market Sentiment Speaks: I Fear For Retirees For The Next 20 Years - 1st Dec 21 t
Will the Anointed Finanical Experts Get It Wrong Again? - 1st Dec 21
Main Differences Between the UK and Canadian Gaming Markets - 1st Dec 21
Bitcoin Price TRIGGER for Accumulating Into Alt Coins for 2022 Price Explosion - 30th Nov 21
Omicron Covid Wave 4 Impact on Financial Markets - 30th Nov 21
Can You Hear It? That’s the Crowd Booing Gold’s Downturn - 30th Nov 21
Economic and Market Impacts of Omicron Strain Covid 4th Wave - 30th Nov 21
Stock Market Historical Trends Suggest A Strengthening Bullish Trend In December - 30th Nov 21
Crypto Market Analysis: What Trading Will Look Like in 2022 for Novice and Veteran Traders? - 30th Nov 21
Best Stocks for Investing to Profit form the Metaverse and Get Rich - 29th Nov 21
Should You Invest In Real Estate In 2021? - 29th Nov 21
Silver Long-term Trend Analysis - 28th Nov 21
Silver Mining Stocks Fundamentals - 28th Nov 21
Crude Oil Didn’t Like Thanksgiving Turkey This Year - 28th Nov 21
Sheffield First Snow Winter 2021 - Snowballs and Snowmen Fun - 28th Nov 21
Stock Market Investing LESSON - Buying Value - 27th Nov 21
Corsair MP600 NVME M.2 SSD 66% Performance Loss After 6 Months of Use - Benchmark Tests - 27th Nov 21
Stock Maket Trading Lesson - How to REALLY Trade Markets - 26th Nov 21
SILVER Price Trend Analysis - 26th Nov 21
Federal Reserve Asks Americans to Eat Soy “Meat” for Thanksgiving - 26th Nov 21
Is the S&P 500 Topping or Just Consolidating? - 26th Nov 21
Is a Bigger Drop in Gold Price Just Around the Corner? - 26th Nov 21
Financial Stocks ETF Sector XLF Pullback Sets Up A New $43.60 Upside Target - 26th Nov 21
A Couple of Things to Think About Before Buying Shares - 25th Nov 21
UK Best Fixed Rate Tariff Deal is to NOT FIX Gas and Electric Energy Tariffs During Winter 2021-22 - 25th Nov 21
Stock Market Begins it's Year End Seasonal Santa Rally - 24th Nov 21
How Silver Can Conquer $50+ in 2022 - 24th Nov 21
Stock Market Betting on Hawkish Fed - 24th Nov 21
Stock Market Elliott Wave Trend Forecast - 24th Nov 21
Your once-a-year All-Access Financial Markets Analysis Pass - 24th Nov 21
Did Zillow’s $300 million flop prove me wrong? - 24th Nov 21
Now Malaysian Drivers Renew Their Kurnia Car Insurance Online With Fincrew.my - 24th Nov 21
Gold / Silver Ratio - 23rd Nov 21
Stock Market Sentiment Speaks: Can We Get To 5500SPX In 2022? But 4440SPX Comes First - 23rd Nov 21
A Month-to-month breakdown of how Much Money Individuals are Spending on Stocks - 23rd Nov 21
S&P 500: Rallying Tech Stocks vs. Plummeting Oil Stocks - 23rd Nov 21
Like the Latest Bond Flick, the US Dollar Has No Time to Die - 23rd Nov 21
Why BITCOIN NEW ALL TIME HIGH Changes EVERYTHING! - 22nd Nov 21
Cannabis ETF MJ Basing & Volatility Patterns - 22nd Nov 21
The Most Important Lesson Learned from this COVID Pandemic - 22nd Nov 21
Dow Stock Market Trend Analysis - 22nd Nov 21

Market Oracle FREE Newsletter

How to Protect your Wealth by Investing in AI Tech Stocks

Why Investing in Gold Will Save Your Butt

Commodities / Gold and Silver 2010 Nov 03, 2010 - 01:48 PM GMT

By: Richard_Daughty

Commodities

Best Financial Markets Analysis ArticleWhen I got back to the office, the place was abuzz, all stemming from how my boss wanted to "see me" as soon as I got back from wherever the hell I was. I knew what it was about. It was about old man Sanderson and the stupid Sanderson account.

The problem was that I had just seen the Britebart.tv video of the megalomaniacal and totally incompetent Harry Reid, Congressional Representative from Nevada and doofus extraordinaire, saying, "But for me, we'd be in a worldwide depression."


So, inspired, I told Sanderson to stick his problems, and that, "But for me, you would be sued into bankruptcy after using our defective parts, ya moron!"

So I grudgingly went up to her office, and the first thing I see is her stupid secretary, who hates my guts because I once told her to buy gold, silver and oil against the terrible inflation that will result from the traitorous neo-Keynesian econometric nitwits at the Federal Reserve creating so much excess money, especially when the corrupt federal government was monstrously deficit-spending us into bankruptcy.

So, a few days later, I saw her in the hallway, and being a friendly, collegial type of guy, I casually asked her if she had bought any gold, silver or oil so that she could Save Her Butt (SHB) when the devastating inflation and economic collapse hits, which has happened to every lowlife, dirtbag deficit-spending government who tried this stupid crap Every Freaking Time (EFT) in the last 4,500 years.

She admitted that she hadn't, so I said to her, in a delicate way, like a kindly uncle gently instructing a wayward and ignorant child, "Then you're a moron! Instead of gold, silver and oil saving your butt, which, by the way, looks big in those pants, it is going to get chewed up by ruinous inflation and economic collapse!"

Well, I figured that she would say, "Thanks for the important information!" since she has beneficially learned - at absolutely no cost to her! - that she is a moron, plus she now knows that those pants make her butt look big. A two-fer!

She did not, as I supposed, thank me. Instead, she's hated me ever since, and every time I get summoned to my boss's office, I always ask her stupid secretary, "Have you bought any gold, silver or oil to save that big butt of yours from the raging inflation in prices that will be caused by the Federal Reserve creating so much money?" and she says, "No," and I say, "Then you're a moron!" and she replies, "No, YOU'RE the moron!" and I will cleverly reply, "No, YOU'RE the moron!" and she's yelling back at me, "No, YOU'RE the moron!" which is about when my boss usually comes out of her office and tells us to immediately stop acting like children.

I say, "It's her that is acting like a child with a big butt! I tell her to buy gold, silver and oil, which is the only intelligent, time-tested, guaranteed thing to do when the loathsome Federal Reserve is creating so much money, but she never does! So she's the childish idiot, not me!"

Well, my boss, with an angry look on her face, hisses at me through clenched teeth to "get into my office this instant!"

Well, it turns out that she had found out that somebody (meaning me) had screwed up the big order from old man Sanderson, and now the Sanderson account was in danger, and he was really angry.

She says, "What did you do to him to make him angrily cancel his account, threaten to have his lawyers sue us, and make a lot of vague death threats against you personally?"

Well, I told her that the problem was caused by The Washington Post breaking the story that the Commodity Futures Trading Commission is, as was always suspected, corrupt. The headline was "Commodity Futures Trading Commission judge says colleague biased against complainants."

It turns out that George H. Painter is "one of two administrative law judges presiding over investor complaints at the Commodity Futures Trading Commission," and he writes that the other CFTC judge, Judge Bruce Levine, had "a secret agreement with a former Republican chairwoman of the agency to stand in the way of investors filing complaints with the agency."

The seamy corruption was a permanent bias against investors in disputes "as a favor to Wendy Gramm, then Chairwoman of the Commission" to "never rule in a complainant's favor."

Damningly, Mr. Painter wrote, "A review of his rulings will confirm that he fulfilled his vow," and that in the last 10 years, "Levine had never ruled in favor of an investor." Never!

The important part, for me, was when her husband, the laughable former senator from Texas, Phil Gramm, said he would "pass along a message" but added, "I doubt she's going to want to get involved in this."

My boss, by this time, was looking at me with this look of unbelieving incredulousness on her stupid face, her mouth actually falling open in stunned stupefaction. Then she says to me, "What has that got to do with the Sanderson account?"

So, I said, as will probably Ms. Gramm, "I don't want to get involved in this!"

Then I got up, left her office in a huff, and went out to have a few drinks to steady my nerves, figuring that by the time I get to work tomorrow, she will have smoothed things over with Sanderson and we can all start some crapola "healing process" of forgiving and forgetting.

And her secretary? She's still a moron who has not bought any gold, silver or oil. Just between you and me, maybe that explains her fat butt! Hahaha!

If so, then my new Mogambo Slogan Of Inspiration (MSOI) is, "Whee! Buying gold, silver and oil is an easy investment, and in doing so, I got a great-looking butt for free, too!"

Copyright © 2010 Daily Reckoning

© 2010 Copyright The Daily Reckoning - All Rights Reserved
Disclaimer: The above is a matter of opinion provided for general information purposes only and is not intended as investment advice. Information and analysis above are derived from sources and utilising methods believed to be reliable, but we cannot accept responsibility for any losses you may incur as a result of this analysis. Individuals should consult with their personal financial advisors.


© 2005-2019 http://www.MarketOracle.co.uk - The Market Oracle is a FREE Daily Financial Markets Analysis & Forecasting online publication.


Comments

Steve Angona
04 Nov 10, 10:43
Mogambo Recommendations

Senor Mogambo always recommends to buy gold, silver and oil, but I feel guns and toilet paper are necessary investments too. What are we going to do if the dollar collapses? We will be forced to use them for toilet paper and the paper used in dollars is very rough for this purpose. Regards from Bogota Colombia , Steve Angona


Post Comment

Only logged in users are allowed to post comments. Register/ Log in