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Obama's Party Joke Spotlights North Korea

Politics / US Politics Dec 21, 2014 - 06:06 PM GMT

By: Andrew_McKillop

Politics

Don't Obamify His Name
Kim Jon Bama, AKA president Barack Obama delivered his own party joke at what was billed as his end-year conference and Q&A, December 19. This was two day's after Vladimir Putin did his own often light-hearted and boisterous same thing. Commentators warned us to only take what Jon Bama was saying as a last pirouette of presidential power and privilege, before Republicans take full control of the floors of both houses in January. So Obama was witty, formal, stern and forthright about finally ending the 50-year blockade of Cuba, a small island country run as the Castro family firm, and starting a spanking "new" crusade - against equally small and unimportant North Korea. Which has been US-blockaded about 60 years


Putin took around 15 minutes to give his own backdrop for the year 2014, Obama was through in a matter of 3 minutes, throwing the audience some stuff about global warming, then telling us all that the US economy is just exactly hunky-dory. And then he launched into his project with the State Dept's on how we can give fantastic publicity, free, to Sony Entertainment. But because they are cowards, they pulled the film.

Obama said Sony was wrong to give in to intimidation. He said that was as wrong as an average American GI Joe not going to a football game on the offchance that terrorists planned to attack the stadium exactly that day. Obama also said that North Korea had atacked the "rules of the road" set by the "international community" and the USA would respond and react to cyber attacks – but he declined to give details.It was party time.

His one-liner for this was:  "Weak states and non-stage actors pose cyber threats" to his global community, which for the moment does not include Putin's Russia! This however leaves open the delicious prospect for CIA sleuths to prove that North Korea was aided and abetted by Russia, headed by The Pariah, to crack the enigma code of Google and Twitter. And why not also China?

This could be an intelligence coup as great as the 2002 endeavors, by the same sleuths (manfully aided by the UK's Tony Blair and his English sleuths) to prove that the Afghan Taliban, and Saddam Hussein's government of Iraq "worked hand in glove".They had nukes and CBW. What are we going to do? The Bush-Blair colonial war, Indiana Jones-style against Iraq, wearing pith helmets in the desert (and now Internet enhanced). Criminal madness.

Is North Korea the Next Syria?
Obama took the time to felicitate one of the "nice" category of White House accredited press reporters (he also has a "nasty" category). She is going to Brussels very soon and Obama told her that it was a "nice place" to visit and they make "great chili con carne over there". Not like in Hawaii where he was going.

As a Christmas gift to US Republicans and their fellow-travelers in European right wing groups, and parties either inside government or outside it like France's Front National or English UKIP, it would be hard to beat the prospect of yet another colonial war for freedom/ The freedom to consume KFC, Sony Entertainment and McDonalds, and too bad if the real world is not fantasy-friendly. The first Obama-Nigel Farage summit will be really something. Maybe they can sell each other hamburgers in a twilight pizza hut near Moscow?.

To be sure, North Korea's brand of Marxist rigor and personality-cult hysteria could possibly be branded "similar to" Wahabism and the "Islam for Dummies" crowd of Punk Pyschopaths who call themseves ISIS, ISIL, Derch or Lurch. Schwarmerei died ou around 350 years ago, so why not ISIS too? Anyway, Obama didn't talk about nothing to do with those foreigners over there in the Middle East. North Korea has some major natural resources if not carved stone Buddhas in the hillsides, like you used to see on a tourist visit to Afghanistan. There may not be large reserves of onshore or more-likely offshore oil and gas, but its hyper-regimented population would be a shoe-in to work as slave labour for Apple, in a sweat shop producing coal-fueled "environment friendly: smart phones for western consumer hypocrites!

North Korea has relatively well-developed transport and energy infrastructures, ripe for industrial development as an Export Platform for late stage capitalism. Maybe China can buy it?

The Helicopter Is Waiting
Barack Obama didn't have much time, right from the start! The helicopter was out there burning kerosene on the lawn, emittiing CO2, the dogs were ready, Michelle had torn herself away from Twitter, the whole gang was ready! Those press corps dopes could scram, and invent anything they like about the conference. He was going to Hawaii to play golf or maybe do some scuba diving.

I wasn't invited to the press conference for some reason so I couldn't ask him about my scuba diving instructor friend Rutherford. He mostly works in Indonesia and I met him close by the BT Group telecom centre in Rose street, Edinburgh, Alba. He was talking to me about Edward Snowden and throwing me some stuff about global warming and acifidification of the oceans, so I told him its like saying Darwin invented cockroaches and dinosaurs, the latter after the former.  Anyway I owe him a drink so if Obalma finds in Hawaii it is Rutherford who is training him, tell Rutherford I'm hoping to see him again. Thi mi sibh a dh'aithgearr.

But as for that Kim Jon Sony guy over in east Asia, Obama said, we shouldn't take this little dictator guy too seriously. Lile president Putin said, Obama asked how can that little guy impose sanctions on me? Maybe Kim Jon Joe likes basketball and he could play with me some time, and we could do some cool rap music together as a clip for Sony Entertainment? Obama didn't have time for that so we can tell him the original 2013-2014 Russian budget set by the Kremlin was on a basis of 3500 roubls for 100 barrels of oil, or $1 for 35 roubles. Bye bye for now and Ciao!

By Andrew McKillop

Contact: xtran9@gmail.com

Former chief policy analyst, Division A Policy, DG XVII Energy, European Commission. Andrew McKillop Biographic Highlights

Co-author 'The Doomsday Machine', Palgrave Macmillan USA, 2012

Andrew McKillop has more than 30 years experience in the energy, economic and finance domains. Trained at London UK’s University College, he has had specially long experience of energy policy, project administration and the development and financing of alternate energy. This included his role of in-house Expert on Policy and Programming at the DG XVII-Energy of the European Commission, Director of Information of the OAPEC technology transfer subsidiary, AREC and researcher for UN agencies including the ILO.

© 2014 Copyright Andrew McKillop - All Rights Reserved Disclaimer: The above is a matter of opinion provided for general information purposes only and is not intended as investment advice. Information and analysis above are derived from sources and utilising methods believed to be reliable, but we cannot accept responsibility for any losses you may incur as a result of this analysis. Individuals should consult with their personal financial advisor.

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